You Say “Tomato,” I Say “Tomate”
Some lesbian couples jump into “we” mode quickly: “We love Japanese food”; “We don’t like hockey.” There’s this notion that the pair is perfectly compatible, inseparable, and share the same opinions on just about everything, despite differences in personality or attributes (i.e., “she’s the smart one, but we like all the same movies”; “she’s the athletic one, but we like the same restaurants”). After the novelty of the relationship wears thin, these differences will emerge and, often, couples don’t know how to deal with the realization that they are more different than they once believed.
In multicultural relationships, the differences in the couple are usually obvious and varied. They don’t expect each other to mirror their respective desires, tastes, and opinions. Each woman in a multicultural couple is introduced to new experiences, foods, art, films, music, etc. The result can be a truly spectacular pairing, as each woman grows individually while the relationship evolves.
Different cultural backgrounds — different ethnicities, religions, nationalities, etc. — should NEVER be a reason to shy away from a relationship. Multicultural relationships tend to have a great chance of succeeding.
If problems occur, they usually revolve around family issues. With a sense of maturity and priority, these family conflicts SHOULD become less prevalent and/or less intense over time, as women mature and the relationship develops. A woman might have to choose between her lover and her family, though, but that’s not new to gay life in general.
