Too Many Pussies
Dear Dyke Whisperer, I really like this woman I’m dating, but she has too many damn cats (4) in her tiny apartment! They are EVERYEHERE and into EVERYTHING. They drive me crazy, and the more I ignore them the more they cling to me. How can I convince her to get rid of a couple of them?
Irritated in Illinois
Dear Irritated,
What exactly would you have her do? Kill two of them? Kick two out of the apartment? Take two to the local animal shelter? You would be okay with that? As I type this — and understanding something about feline behavior — I imagine the cats are “thinking” there are too many of you.
The woman has cats. She loves her cats. The cats were there first.
Some cats respond to passive behavior: the more you ignore them the less threatening you seem, and the less afraid they are to approach you. That is besides the point, however.
Adjust to the cats or avoid her apartment. If you cannot do either, you’ll need to find a new woman. The little critters sense your hostility, and I wouldn’t blame them if they relieved themselves on you or your clothing.
