Free Spirits
Dear Dyke Whisperer, I seem to be attracted to crazy, unstable, unpredictable women. My friends think I’m a masochist, but I’m just not attracted to the quiet and stable girls. Is there something wrong with me?
Minnesota Masochist
Dear Minnesota,
First, I don’t think you’re a masochist. I think you might just enjoy the excitement that less conventional and, perhaps, more extroverted women have to offer. We are all attracted to certain physical and personality types. As long as these women are not self-destructive, abusive, or physically dangerous — and if you don’t mind the drama that unpredictability inevitably spawns — I say that you should just enjoy yourself during the good times and emotionally prepare yourself for the bad times.
Creativity and passion sometimes manifest as “socially unacceptable” behavior. Personally, I find women who rebel against social conventions to be irresistible. Now, along with this rebellion, one must expect erratic behavior. This, again, as long as abuse (directed to herself, you, or others) or addiction is not involved, can lead to a very exciting union and dramatic intervals, as lines are crossed and boundaries discarded again and again and again.
It’s dangerous to love a wild woman; it’s enchanting to love one as well. We’re describing free-spirits here. You won’t be able to tame them — ever. This quality is what likely draws both you, me, and countless others toward them. Some of our sapphic sisters might prefer safer, more stable, more predictable partners. That’s who they prefer and that’s fantastic. I doubt you’ll ever be able to make these stability-seekers understand your desires and motivations. Fine. However, don’t go to them for comfort when you’re in a drama-cycle: they’ll just get frustrated with you, call you immature, and remind you that this is all your fault for getting involved with yet another ”crazy” woman.
Follow your heart always and best wishes to you.
